Another song that just resounds in my heart and soul:
"One Pure and Holy Passion"
By Christ Tomlin
Give me one pure and holy passion
Give me one magnificent obsession
Give me one glorious ambition for my life
To know and follow hard after You
Give me one pure and holy passion
Give me on magnificent obsession
Give me one glorious ambition for my life
To know and follow hard after You
To know and follow hard after you
To grow as your dicsiple in your truth
This world is empty, pale, and poor
Compared to knowing you, my Lord
Lead me on and I will run after you
Lead me on and I will run after you
Give me one pure and holy passion
Give me one magnificent obsession
Give me one glorious ambition for my life
To know and follow hard after you
To know and follow hard after you
To grow as your disciple in the truth
This world is empty, pale, and poor
Compared to knowing you my Lord
Lead me on and I will run after you
Lord to know and follow hard after you
And to grow as your disciple in your truth
This world is empty, pale, and poor
Compared to knowing you my Lord
Lead me on and I will run after you
Lead me on and I will run after you
Lead me on and I will run after you
Tuesday, March 30, 2010
Spring Blossoms
This time of year reminds me of this song:
"You Are So Faithful"
Like the sun that rises everyday,
Like the sun that rises everyday,
You are so faithful.
Lord, You are faithful
Like the rain that You send
And every breath that I breathe
You are so faithful, Lord
Like the rose that comes alive every spring,
You are so faithful.
Lord, You are faithful.
Like the life that You give,
to every beat of my heart,
You are so faithful, Lord.
I see the cross and the price You had to pay,
I see the blood that washed my sins away.
In the midst of the storm
through the wind and the waves,
You'll still be faithful,
You'll still be faithful,
When the stars refuse to shine and time is no more,
You'll still be faithful,
You'll still be faithful, Lord.
From Streams in the Desert:
...You can force a rosebud open, but you spoil the flower.
"Not what I will, but what you will" (Mark 14:36). Stephen Merritt
"His Way"
God sent me on when I would stay
('twas cool within the wood);
I did not know the reason why.
I heard a boulder crashing by
'Cross the path where I had stood.
He had me stay when I would go;
"Your will be done," I said.
They found one day at early dawn,
Across the way I would have gone,
A serpent with a mangled head.
I ask no more the reason why,
Although I may not see
The path ahead, His way I go;
for though I know not, He does know,
And He will choose safe paths for me.
---From Sunday School Times
Monday, March 29, 2010
Stepping Stone
After I wrote the last post and meditating about things, the LORD gave me the following through a friend:
From My Utmost for His Highest – If you become a necessity to someone else’s life, you are out of God’s will. As a servant, your primary responsibility is to be a “friend of the bridegroom” (John 3:29). When you see a person who is close to grasping the claims of Jesus Christ, you know that your influence has been used in the right direction. And when you begin to see that person in the middle of a difficult and painful struggle, don’t try to prevent it, but pray that his difficulty will grow even ten times stronger, until no power on earth or in hell could hold him away from Jesus Christ. Over and over again, we try to be amateur providences in someone’s life. We are indeed amateurs, coming in and actually preventing God’s will and saying, “This person should not have to experience this difficulty.” Instead of being friends of the Bridegroom, our sympathy gets in the way. One day that person will say to us, “You are a thief; you stole my desire to follow Jesus, and because of you I lost sight of Him.”
So, often I think I know best or I get in the way of what God want to do in the person and actually hinder God’s work in that person’s life.
Today in my devotion, Streams in the Desert I read about a monk who planted a an olive tree sampling. Each day he prayed for the tree and what, in his estimation, the tree needed to grow…rain, sun, frost…but it died. It was contrasted by another monk who also planted a little tree and his tree was thriving. This was his explanation: “I entrust my tree to its god. He who made it knows better than a man like me what it needs. I gave God no constraints or conditions, except to pray, ‘Lord, send what it needs – whether that be a storm or sunshine, wind, rain, or frost. You made it, and you know best what it needs.’ “
Father teach me to pray. To know when, to know how. Father may I be a “friend of the Bridegroom”, may I be a stepping stone, and may I not be a hindrance.
From My Utmost for His Highest – If you become a necessity to someone else’s life, you are out of God’s will. As a servant, your primary responsibility is to be a “friend of the bridegroom” (John 3:29). When you see a person who is close to grasping the claims of Jesus Christ, you know that your influence has been used in the right direction. And when you begin to see that person in the middle of a difficult and painful struggle, don’t try to prevent it, but pray that his difficulty will grow even ten times stronger, until no power on earth or in hell could hold him away from Jesus Christ. Over and over again, we try to be amateur providences in someone’s life. We are indeed amateurs, coming in and actually preventing God’s will and saying, “This person should not have to experience this difficulty.” Instead of being friends of the Bridegroom, our sympathy gets in the way. One day that person will say to us, “You are a thief; you stole my desire to follow Jesus, and because of you I lost sight of Him.”
So, often I think I know best or I get in the way of what God want to do in the person and actually hinder God’s work in that person’s life.
Today in my devotion, Streams in the Desert I read about a monk who planted a an olive tree sampling. Each day he prayed for the tree and what, in his estimation, the tree needed to grow…rain, sun, frost…but it died. It was contrasted by another monk who also planted a little tree and his tree was thriving. This was his explanation: “I entrust my tree to its god. He who made it knows better than a man like me what it needs. I gave God no constraints or conditions, except to pray, ‘Lord, send what it needs – whether that be a storm or sunshine, wind, rain, or frost. You made it, and you know best what it needs.’ “
Father teach me to pray. To know when, to know how. Father may I be a “friend of the Bridegroom”, may I be a stepping stone, and may I not be a hindrance.
Sunday, March 28, 2010
Memorial Service/Luncheon
Sometime back I received an invitation to a Memorial Service/Luncheon given by Charter Hospice for those that have gone on. This was the hospice that took care of Mom in her last day. It really blessed my heart. I really didn't know if I wanted to be part of this, but a friend encouraged me to attend. Now, I can say that I am so glad that I attended. The place was beautiful. A couple of weeks prior to the event, they had us submit a picture of our loved one so that they could make a slideshow.
The place was decorated with items that represented "life". They had tables all around the room where they had framed pictures of our loved ones - we were asked to bring one that day and we got to take it home. Our center piece was a branch with a bird nest and a butterfly (see picture above). It was simple, but beautiful. We also received and ornament as a reminder, a token. As the slide show was presented and the names of those loved ones where called out, the family members got to go up and light a candle - beautiful! We went outside and released balloons with loving thoughts about our loved ones, and they had a "releasing of the doves ceremony". It was so beautiful to see the different groups of doves gather together in the sky and then fly together. I thought of that song, "I'll fly away, o glory, I'll fly away." I thought about how one day, I too will fly away to heaven and will gather with those that have gone on before me - it was very moving. The visual was incredible!
They also read something about the meaning of the folding of the American Flag, that I had never heard before - I really liked it:
WHY THE AMERICAN FLAG IS FOLDED 13 TIMES
Have you ever noticed on TV or at military funerals that the honor guard pays meticulous attention to correctly folding the American flag 13 times? I've known how the 21 gun salute was determined (adding the individual digits of 1776), but only recently learned why the flag was folded 13 times when it is lowered or when it is folded and handed to the widow at the burial of a veteran.
HERE IT IS:
The first fold of our flag is a symbol of life.
The second fold is a symbol of our belief in eternal life.
The third fold is made in honor and remembrance of the veterans departing our ranks who gave a portion of their lives for the defense of our country to attain peace throughout the world.
The fourth fold represents our weaker nature, for as American citizens trusting in God, it is to Him we turn in times of peace as well as in time of war for His divine guidance.
The fifth fold is a tribute to our country, for in the words of Stephen Decatur, "Our Country, in dealing with other countries, may she always be right; but it is still our country, right or wrong."
The sixth fold is for where our hearts lie. It is with our heart that we pledge allegiance to the flag of the United States Of America, and to the Republic for which it stands, one Nation under God, indivisible, with Liberty and Justice for all.
The seventh fold is a tribute to our Armed Forces, for it is through the Armed Forces that we protect our country and our flag against all her enemies, whether they be found within or without the boundaries of our republic.
The eighth fold is a tribute to the one who entered into the valley of the shadow of death, that we might see the light of day, and to honor mother, for whom it flies on Mother's Day.
The ninth fold is a tribute to womanhood; for it has been through their faith, their love, loyalty and devotion that the character of the men and women who have made this country great has been molded.
The tenth fold is a tribute to the father, for he, too, has given his sons and daughters for the defense of our country since they were first born.
The eleventh fold, in the eyes of a Hebrew citizen represents the lower portion of the seal of King David and King Solomon, and glorifies in their eyes, the God of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob.
The twelfth fold, in the eyes of a Christian citizen, represents an emblem of eternity and glorifies, in their eyes, God the Father, the Son, and Holy Spirit.
When the flag is completely folded, the stars are uppermost reminding us of our nation's motto, "In God We Trust". After the flag is completely folded and tucked in, it takes on the appearance of a cocked hat, ever reminding us of the soldiers who served under General George Washington, and the sailors and marines who served under Captain John Paul Jones, who were followed by their comrades and shipmates in the Armed Forces of the United States, preserving for us the rights, privileges, and freedoms we enjoy today. There are some traditions and ways of doing things which have deep meaning. You will see many flags folded in the coming weeks, and now you will know why.
After all this we were served an incredible lunch. I was so blessed with all that was done. There was a limit on the people we could bring - this was the only bad thing, because I wish I would have had more of my family members be a part of this.
Saturday, March 27, 2010
Me-limited, frail; Christ-powerful and strong
Sitting helpless, unable to move or go take care of things outside or anywhere.
*Trash can knocked over; trash going all over the place. I want so bad to go and pick it up, but “I CAN’T”. All that is within me is dying to go and pick it up, but “I CAN’T”.
*”Things” in my back porch are being tossed around, some even falling and breaking, being shattered on the ground. “I CAN’T” shelter them, “I CAN’T” save them, I CAN’T even pick them up. All that is within me is dying to go and clean up, but “I CAN’T”.
I didn’t KNOW this wind was coming, it just showed up, unannounced. If I would have known, I could have been prepared – ready. Maybe I would have put some of the stuff on my back porch away or protected it in some way. I did not KNOW the wind was coming.
Sometimes things in our life “just happen” – they come unannounced, unplanned, we are simply not prepared for them. What is our reaction?
Sometimes people around us are falling, failing, breaking, shattered – do we think we can go pick them up and protect them? Do we think we can keep them safe?
In the spiritual realm, however, I am not helpless or unable to move. God tells me that I wrestle not against flesh and blood but against principalities (Ephesians 6:12) and that our weapons of our warfare are not carnal but MIGHTY in Christ Jesus to bring down strongholds (2 Corinthians 10:3-6).
Even if we are bed-bound we can pray and intercede for those in need of deliverance. It will be God who will pick them up and heal their brokenness. Then it will be HIM glorified and Christ exalted. (2 Timothy 2:9b…the word of God is not bound.)
Father, in our weakness and in our frailty, YOU remain strong; You remain able.
You are able to save.
You are able to redeem.
You are able to heal.
You are able to restore.
You are not limited.
You are All-Knowing, All-Powerful, Our Sovereign King, Bless Your Name, O LORD!
*Trash can knocked over; trash going all over the place. I want so bad to go and pick it up, but “I CAN’T”. All that is within me is dying to go and pick it up, but “I CAN’T”.
*”Things” in my back porch are being tossed around, some even falling and breaking, being shattered on the ground. “I CAN’T” shelter them, “I CAN’T” save them, I CAN’T even pick them up. All that is within me is dying to go and clean up, but “I CAN’T”.
I didn’t KNOW this wind was coming, it just showed up, unannounced. If I would have known, I could have been prepared – ready. Maybe I would have put some of the stuff on my back porch away or protected it in some way. I did not KNOW the wind was coming.
Sometimes things in our life “just happen” – they come unannounced, unplanned, we are simply not prepared for them. What is our reaction?
Sometimes people around us are falling, failing, breaking, shattered – do we think we can go pick them up and protect them? Do we think we can keep them safe?
In the spiritual realm, however, I am not helpless or unable to move. God tells me that I wrestle not against flesh and blood but against principalities (Ephesians 6:12) and that our weapons of our warfare are not carnal but MIGHTY in Christ Jesus to bring down strongholds (2 Corinthians 10:3-6).
Even if we are bed-bound we can pray and intercede for those in need of deliverance. It will be God who will pick them up and heal their brokenness. Then it will be HIM glorified and Christ exalted. (2 Timothy 2:9b…the word of God is not bound.)
Father, in our weakness and in our frailty, YOU remain strong; You remain able.
You are able to save.
You are able to redeem.
You are able to heal.
You are able to restore.
You are not limited.
You are All-Knowing, All-Powerful, Our Sovereign King, Bless Your Name, O LORD!
Monday, March 22, 2010
Our Testimony
Revelation 12:11 - And they overcame him by the blood of the Lamb, and by the word of their testimony, and they loved not their lives unto the death.
This weekend God showed Himself powerful. It had been a while since my husband and I went on a Couples Retreat. This past weekend we had the opportunity of going away with other couples up to Twin Peaks. The weather was wonderful and their was still enough snow to enjoy.
The weather was incredible, the surroundings amazing, the food scrumptious, the teachings totally anointed by God...in one word - AMAZING!!!
Yet, the best part of it all was that God healed, renewed, revived, exhorted - GOD WAS TOTALLY GLORIFIED!
Our testimony is a powerful tool. One that can be used by the LORD to speak to others. So often we think that we are alone in our trial, or that no one would understand what we are going through, or even embarrassed to speak of your situation. Whatever the reason might be, we keep silent. We don't speak forth and proclaim what God has done for us. Yet, when others hear and see the evidence of God's handiwork, they get encouraged and get strengthened.
Because of our great weekend, a weekend filled with answers to prayer and seeing God's amazing hand, this morning I woke up so encouraged and joyful. I was getting ready to have some sister's over for breakfast and prayer. I went to take a shower and WAM!!! As I lifted my leg up and to shave (graphic, I know, but I need to give you the picture) something popped on my lower back and I went down for the count. I thought I was going to pass out of the pain. I prayed like crazy. I tried to maneuver and move, but the more I moved or tried to move, something else would tighten up. Don't ask me how I got out or what happened next...it's kind of ugly.
My wonderful friends arrived. They prayed over me for healing, I felt better and we enjoyed each other's company. However, when they left I could not function. I called my chiropractor, I prayed and prayed so that I could get in the car and get over to his office - praise God, I did. He says I tore something and had a joint from my hip out of place. Once that we in place, I felt better but the tare is going to take "REST". I came home feeling kind of bummed, but then my nephew called to ask me how our Retreat went. As I began recounting what God had done, my spirit began to soar and praise God. Then I came to the computer and received a beautiful e-mail from a Sister in Christ, and you know what - IT IS ALL WORTH IT! God has a plan even for this...so to God be the glory!
Friday, March 19, 2010
Devo - Streams in the Desert
My Devotional Today from Streams in the Desert
Dear friends, do not be surprised at the painful trial you are suffering…But rejoice that you participate in the sufferings of Christ. (1 Peter 4:12-13)
Many hours of waiting were necessary to enrich David’s harp with song. And hours of waiting in the wilderness will provide us with psalms of “thanksgiving and the sound of singing” (Isaiah 51:3). The hearts of the discouraged here below will be lifted, and joy will be brought to our Father’s heavenly home.
What was the preparation for Jesse’s son, David, to compose songs unlike any others ever heard before on earth? It was the sinful persecution he endured at the hands of the wicked that brought forth his cries for God’s help. Then David’s faint hope in God’s goodness blossomed into full songs of rejoicing, declaring the Lord’s mighty deliverances and multiplied mercies. Every sorrow was yet another note from his harp, and every deliverance another theme of praise.
One stinging sorrow spared would have been one blessing missed and unclaimed. One difficulty or danger escaped – how great would have been our loss! The thrilling psalms where God’s people today find expression for their grief or praise might never have been known.
Waiting on God and abiding in His will is to know Him in “the fellowship of sharing in His sufferings” (Philippians 3:10) and “to be conformed to the likeness of his Son” (Romans 8:29). Therefore if God’s desire is to enlarge your capacity for spiritual understanding, do not be frightened by the greater realm of suffering that awaits you. The Lord’s capacity for sympathy is greater still, for the breath of the Holy Spirit into His new creation never makes a heart hard and insensitive, but affectionate, tender, and true. Anna Shipton
God spoke to my heart again. Confirming the message that He has been putting on my heart.
Spirit of Truth continue to speak, open our understanding and give us ears to hear what the Spirit is saying to us. May we not fear what's up ahead. Give us the desire to be doers of Your Word and not simply hearers. In Jesus Name.
Dear friends, do not be surprised at the painful trial you are suffering…But rejoice that you participate in the sufferings of Christ. (1 Peter 4:12-13)
Many hours of waiting were necessary to enrich David’s harp with song. And hours of waiting in the wilderness will provide us with psalms of “thanksgiving and the sound of singing” (Isaiah 51:3). The hearts of the discouraged here below will be lifted, and joy will be brought to our Father’s heavenly home.
What was the preparation for Jesse’s son, David, to compose songs unlike any others ever heard before on earth? It was the sinful persecution he endured at the hands of the wicked that brought forth his cries for God’s help. Then David’s faint hope in God’s goodness blossomed into full songs of rejoicing, declaring the Lord’s mighty deliverances and multiplied mercies. Every sorrow was yet another note from his harp, and every deliverance another theme of praise.
One stinging sorrow spared would have been one blessing missed and unclaimed. One difficulty or danger escaped – how great would have been our loss! The thrilling psalms where God’s people today find expression for their grief or praise might never have been known.
Waiting on God and abiding in His will is to know Him in “the fellowship of sharing in His sufferings” (Philippians 3:10) and “to be conformed to the likeness of his Son” (Romans 8:29). Therefore if God’s desire is to enlarge your capacity for spiritual understanding, do not be frightened by the greater realm of suffering that awaits you. The Lord’s capacity for sympathy is greater still, for the breath of the Holy Spirit into His new creation never makes a heart hard and insensitive, but affectionate, tender, and true. Anna Shipton
I thank Christ Jesus our Lord, who has given me strength, that he considered me faithful, appointing me to his service. 1 Timothy 1:12
God spoke to my heart again. Confirming the message that He has been putting on my heart.
Spirit of Truth continue to speak, open our understanding and give us ears to hear what the Spirit is saying to us. May we not fear what's up ahead. Give us the desire to be doers of Your Word and not simply hearers. In Jesus Name.
Thursday, March 18, 2010
What holds me back?
Sorrow and Suffering revisited. The LORD has brought these two faithful companions to my mind, once again. I searched my previous posts to see when I had written about them, it was April 2008.
Part 1
Part 2
Part 3
In this time of transition and change, God has been comforting, loving, assuring, and o so gentle. As of late though He is challenging me. He is beckoning me to go, to trust, to live in full abandonment for Him. At times I can say, “Let’s go LORD. Whatever you want, wherever you say.” Then, my flesh takes over and the doubts come in, then there is fear and doubt and apprehension, etc.
The lyrics to the songs I have posted below are some of the songs that, along with His Word have been ministering to me, challenging me. The song, “Sweetly Broken” brought me to my knees. Sweetly and Broken just don’t seem to go together. Yet, even in the breaking God is so gentle. Last night I had an opportunity to hear from a godly man sharing part of his testimony. This man is an older-seasoned-saint. He stood frail and physically tired, but when he opened his mouth and allowed the “word of his testimony” to go forth, it was amazing! The main thing was that God is a sure REFUGE in time of trouble…and trouble will come. He shared about his wife having cancer and him praying and asking the LORD for a miracle. And, guess what, God choose to take his wife and not heal her. Now, did he walk away? Did he turn his back on God? NO!!! He fell on his face and surrendered fully to the only One who could give him REFUGE and strength for the journey ahead. This man has tasted and seen that the LORD is good. Not because his life has been a walk in the park, but because through his trials and tribulations – his sufferings, God has been glorified and he is being conformed into the image of Christ.
Once again, the LORD brought the verse in Romans 8:32 – He that spared not His own Son, but delivered Him up for us all, how shall He not with Him also freely give us all things? -- God spared not the best He had – His Son. He delivered Jesus up for us all. Will he not FREELY give us all things? My goodness, what questions. What searching of the heart. What else do we want? What else do we need, to give ourselves over to Him in full abandonment, and say with Esther, “and if I perish, I perish.” What do we fear?
Romans 8:28 – And we KNOW that ALL things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to His purpose. – the “all things” include sorrow and suffering, but they will work out for good, God says they will. Then in Romans 8:31 it says, What shall we then say to these things? If God be for us, who can be against us? -- God now only calls us but equips us for what He calls us to do. What holds us back? What do we fear?
Romans 8:18 – For I reckon that the SUFFERINGS of this present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory which shall be revealed in us.
2 Corinthians 1:5 – For as the SUFFERINGS of Christ abound in us, so our consolation also aboundeth by Christ.
Philippians 3:10-11 – That I may know Him, and the power of His resurrection, and the fellowship of His sufferings, being made conformable unto His death; if by any means I might attain unto the resurrection of the dead.
Colossians 1:24 – Who now rejoice in my SUFFERINGS for you, and fill up that which is behind of the afflictions of Christ in my flesh for His body’s sake, which is the church:
Hebrews 2:10 – For it became him, for whom are all things, and by whom are all things, in bringing many sons unto glory, to make the captain of their salvation perfect through SUFFERINGS.
1 Peter 4:12-13 – Beloved, think it not strange concerning the fiery trial which is to try you, as though some strange thing happened unto you: But rejoice, inasmuch as ye are partakers of Christ’s SUFFERINGS; that, when His glory shall be revealed, ye may be glad also with exceeding joy.
Can I say with Isaiah, “Here am I, send me”? Can I say, “Where You bid, I will follow”? Can I be “wholly surrendered” to Him? Can I fall on my knees and say, “I’m offering all of me. Jesus you are all this heart is living for” – without fear of apprehension?
Father time is short. You are even at the door. I desire to follow hard after You. May I not go through the motions and look back one day regretting. I do not want to spend my whole life asking, “What if I had given everything, instead of going through the motions?"
Part 1
Part 2
Part 3
In this time of transition and change, God has been comforting, loving, assuring, and o so gentle. As of late though He is challenging me. He is beckoning me to go, to trust, to live in full abandonment for Him. At times I can say, “Let’s go LORD. Whatever you want, wherever you say.” Then, my flesh takes over and the doubts come in, then there is fear and doubt and apprehension, etc.
The lyrics to the songs I have posted below are some of the songs that, along with His Word have been ministering to me, challenging me. The song, “Sweetly Broken” brought me to my knees. Sweetly and Broken just don’t seem to go together. Yet, even in the breaking God is so gentle. Last night I had an opportunity to hear from a godly man sharing part of his testimony. This man is an older-seasoned-saint. He stood frail and physically tired, but when he opened his mouth and allowed the “word of his testimony” to go forth, it was amazing! The main thing was that God is a sure REFUGE in time of trouble…and trouble will come. He shared about his wife having cancer and him praying and asking the LORD for a miracle. And, guess what, God choose to take his wife and not heal her. Now, did he walk away? Did he turn his back on God? NO!!! He fell on his face and surrendered fully to the only One who could give him REFUGE and strength for the journey ahead. This man has tasted and seen that the LORD is good. Not because his life has been a walk in the park, but because through his trials and tribulations – his sufferings, God has been glorified and he is being conformed into the image of Christ.
Once again, the LORD brought the verse in Romans 8:32 – He that spared not His own Son, but delivered Him up for us all, how shall He not with Him also freely give us all things? -- God spared not the best He had – His Son. He delivered Jesus up for us all. Will he not FREELY give us all things? My goodness, what questions. What searching of the heart. What else do we want? What else do we need, to give ourselves over to Him in full abandonment, and say with Esther, “and if I perish, I perish.” What do we fear?
Romans 8:28 – And we KNOW that ALL things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to His purpose. – the “all things” include sorrow and suffering, but they will work out for good, God says they will. Then in Romans 8:31 it says, What shall we then say to these things? If God be for us, who can be against us? -- God now only calls us but equips us for what He calls us to do. What holds us back? What do we fear?
Romans 8:18 – For I reckon that the SUFFERINGS of this present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory which shall be revealed in us.
2 Corinthians 1:5 – For as the SUFFERINGS of Christ abound in us, so our consolation also aboundeth by Christ.
Philippians 3:10-11 – That I may know Him, and the power of His resurrection, and the fellowship of His sufferings, being made conformable unto His death; if by any means I might attain unto the resurrection of the dead.
Colossians 1:24 – Who now rejoice in my SUFFERINGS for you, and fill up that which is behind of the afflictions of Christ in my flesh for His body’s sake, which is the church:
Hebrews 2:10 – For it became him, for whom are all things, and by whom are all things, in bringing many sons unto glory, to make the captain of their salvation perfect through SUFFERINGS.
1 Peter 4:12-13 – Beloved, think it not strange concerning the fiery trial which is to try you, as though some strange thing happened unto you: But rejoice, inasmuch as ye are partakers of Christ’s SUFFERINGS; that, when His glory shall be revealed, ye may be glad also with exceeding joy.
Can I say with Isaiah, “Here am I, send me”? Can I say, “Where You bid, I will follow”? Can I be “wholly surrendered” to Him? Can I fall on my knees and say, “I’m offering all of me. Jesus you are all this heart is living for” – without fear of apprehension?
Father time is short. You are even at the door. I desire to follow hard after You. May I not go through the motions and look back one day regretting. I do not want to spend my whole life asking, “What if I had given everything, instead of going through the motions?"
Songs
“The Motions” by Matthew West
This might hurt, it's not safe
But I know that I've gotta make a change
I don't care if I break,
At least I'll be feeling something
'Cause just okay is not enough
Help me fight through the nothingness of life
I don't wanna go through the motions
I don't wanna go one more day
without Your all consuming passion inside of me
I don't wanna spend my whole life asking,
"What if I had given everything,
instead of going through the motions?"
No regrets, not this time
I'm gonna let my heart defeat my mind
Let Your love make me whole
I think I'm finally feeling something
'Cause just okay is not enough
Help me fight through the nothingness of this life
'Cause I don't wanna go through the motions
I don't wanna go one more day
without Your all consuming passion inside of me
I don't wanna spend my whole life asking,
"What if I had given everything,
instead of going through the motions?"
take me all the way (take me all the way)
take me all the way ('cause I don't wanna go through the motions)
take me all the way (I know I'm finally feeling something real)
take me all the way
I don't wanna go through the motions
I don't wanna go one more day
without Your all consuming passion inside of me
I don't wanna spend my whole life asking,
"What if I had given everything,
instead of going through the motions?"
I don't wanna go through the motions
I don't wanna go one more day
without Your all consuming passion inside of me
I don't wanna spend my whole life asking,
"What if I had given everything,
instead of going through the motions?"
take me all the way (take me all the way)
take me all the way (I don't wanna go, I don't wanna go)
take me all the way (through the motions)
take me all the way
I don't wanna go through the motions
*********************************
“Consuming Fire”
There must be more than this
oh breath of God come breath within
There must be more than this
Spirit of God we wait for you
Fill us anew we pray
Fill us anew we pray
Consuming Fire
Fan into flame
a passion for your name
Spirit of God
fall in this place
Lord have your way
Lord have your way
with us
Come like a rushing wind
Fill us with power from on high
Now set the captives free
leave us abandoned to your praise
Lord let your glory fall
Lord let your glory fall
********************
“Walk in the Dark”
Where are you taking me-why are we turning here
This road is strange to me-this path is not so clear
Must be the place where my doubt turns to faith
Where I close my eyes and take your hand
I'd rather walk in the dark with Jesus
Than walk in the light on my own
I'd rather go through the valley of the shadow with him
Than to dance on the mountains alone
I'd rather follow wherever he leads me
Than to go where none before me have gone
I'd rather walk in the dark with Jesus
Than to walk in the light of my own
I've made some plans you know-mapped out a strategy
Somebody tell me where did the seasons go-have you forgotten me
I've heard the darkest hour is just before dawn
And wherever you are the sun will shine
There will be shadows-but I won't be shaken
'Cause you've never forsaken a vow
You've never failed me before this I know
And, Jesus, you won't fail me now
******************************
“Sweetly Broken” by Jeremy Riddle
To the cross I look, to the cross I cling
Of its suffering I do drink
Of its work I do sing
For on it my Savior both bruised and crushed
Showed that God is love
And God is just
At the cross You beckon me
You draw me gently to my knees, and I am
Lost for words, so lost in love,
I’m sweetly broken, wholly surrendered
What a priceless gift, undeserved life
Have I been given
Through Christ crucified
You’ve called me out of death
You’ve called me into life
And I was under Your wrath
Now through the cross I’m reconciled
In awe of the cross I must confess
How wondrous Your redeeming love and
How great is Your faithfulness
***************************
“Hungry (Falling on my Knees)”
Hungry, I come to You
For I know You satisfy
I am empty but I know
Your love does not run dry
So I wait for You
So I wait for You
I'm falling on my knees
Offering all of me
Jesus, You're all this heart
Is living for
Broken, I run to You
For Your arms are open wide
I am weary but I know
Your touch restores my life
I'm falling on my knees
Offering all of me
Jesus, You're all this heart
Is living for
Hungry, I come to You
For I know You satisfy
I am empty but I know
Your love does not run dry
This might hurt, it's not safe
But I know that I've gotta make a change
I don't care if I break,
At least I'll be feeling something
'Cause just okay is not enough
Help me fight through the nothingness of life
I don't wanna go through the motions
I don't wanna go one more day
without Your all consuming passion inside of me
I don't wanna spend my whole life asking,
"What if I had given everything,
instead of going through the motions?"
No regrets, not this time
I'm gonna let my heart defeat my mind
Let Your love make me whole
I think I'm finally feeling something
'Cause just okay is not enough
Help me fight through the nothingness of this life
'Cause I don't wanna go through the motions
I don't wanna go one more day
without Your all consuming passion inside of me
I don't wanna spend my whole life asking,
"What if I had given everything,
instead of going through the motions?"
take me all the way (take me all the way)
take me all the way ('cause I don't wanna go through the motions)
take me all the way (I know I'm finally feeling something real)
take me all the way
I don't wanna go through the motions
I don't wanna go one more day
without Your all consuming passion inside of me
I don't wanna spend my whole life asking,
"What if I had given everything,
instead of going through the motions?"
I don't wanna go through the motions
I don't wanna go one more day
without Your all consuming passion inside of me
I don't wanna spend my whole life asking,
"What if I had given everything,
instead of going through the motions?"
take me all the way (take me all the way)
take me all the way (I don't wanna go, I don't wanna go)
take me all the way (through the motions)
take me all the way
I don't wanna go through the motions
*********************************
“Consuming Fire”
There must be more than this
oh breath of God come breath within
There must be more than this
Spirit of God we wait for you
Fill us anew we pray
Fill us anew we pray
Consuming Fire
Fan into flame
a passion for your name
Spirit of God
fall in this place
Lord have your way
Lord have your way
with us
Come like a rushing wind
Fill us with power from on high
Now set the captives free
leave us abandoned to your praise
Lord let your glory fall
Lord let your glory fall
********************
“Walk in the Dark”
Where are you taking me-why are we turning here
This road is strange to me-this path is not so clear
Must be the place where my doubt turns to faith
Where I close my eyes and take your hand
I'd rather walk in the dark with Jesus
Than walk in the light on my own
I'd rather go through the valley of the shadow with him
Than to dance on the mountains alone
I'd rather follow wherever he leads me
Than to go where none before me have gone
I'd rather walk in the dark with Jesus
Than to walk in the light of my own
I've made some plans you know-mapped out a strategy
Somebody tell me where did the seasons go-have you forgotten me
I've heard the darkest hour is just before dawn
And wherever you are the sun will shine
There will be shadows-but I won't be shaken
'Cause you've never forsaken a vow
You've never failed me before this I know
And, Jesus, you won't fail me now
******************************
“Sweetly Broken” by Jeremy Riddle
To the cross I look, to the cross I cling
Of its suffering I do drink
Of its work I do sing
For on it my Savior both bruised and crushed
Showed that God is love
And God is just
At the cross You beckon me
You draw me gently to my knees, and I am
Lost for words, so lost in love,
I’m sweetly broken, wholly surrendered
What a priceless gift, undeserved life
Have I been given
Through Christ crucified
You’ve called me out of death
You’ve called me into life
And I was under Your wrath
Now through the cross I’m reconciled
In awe of the cross I must confess
How wondrous Your redeeming love and
How great is Your faithfulness
***************************
“Hungry (Falling on my Knees)”
Hungry, I come to You
For I know You satisfy
I am empty but I know
Your love does not run dry
So I wait for You
So I wait for You
I'm falling on my knees
Offering all of me
Jesus, You're all this heart
Is living for
Broken, I run to You
For Your arms are open wide
I am weary but I know
Your touch restores my life
I'm falling on my knees
Offering all of me
Jesus, You're all this heart
Is living for
Hungry, I come to You
For I know You satisfy
I am empty but I know
Your love does not run dry
Wednesday, March 10, 2010
The Elephant in the Room
Today has been difficult. I’ve been thinking about Mom…my heart aches and misses her. If you knew the entire story, you would, I think, shake your head. The fact that I actually miss Mom is, even to me, complicated to understand.
Her last Sunday with me comes to mind. She had just eaten breakfast – slower than usual. I was busy trying to get everything taken care of and set up so that I could go to church. I kept looking at her from the corner of my eye, I did not want her to think that I was concerned – if I looked calm and collected, she would rest in that everything was okay. However, I could sense something was not getting better. I finally sat across the table from her to have a much needed conversation, one that we had visited many a time. She almost seemed bothered by me interrupting her puzzle-making-time, but she finally looked up. We talked about wishes, decision, desires…I can almost picture her face and a look in her eyes of “I know what’s happening. I’m okay with it.” I went to church with a heaviness in my heart. I worshiped and prayed to the only One who would, once again, be my Supernatural-Strength in days to come – o how sweet it was. It was almost as if My Jesus cradled me and comforted me in a way that was going to raise me above what was up ahead.
So often I’ve felt that it is almost forbidden to cry, to remember. It is as if people around you are uncomfortable to even bring up Mom’s name. There have been times when all I want to do is sit with someone and simply talk about Mom – My Mom! I wonder how are my brother’s doing? Do they think of her as I do? Are they hurting? Do they need a hug? Do they need to talk about Mom?
Just the other day I received a letter from Charter Hospice (they were the ones that came in to help with Mom’s last days). At first I thought the letter was some form letter to tie up lose ends, you know business. The letter began with “Please accept our heartfelt sympathy in the loss of your mother, Elvira…” “Mom’s name!” was my first thought. This letter went on to say some very kind words. It ended with, “I have enclosed some information that may help you as you begin this journey of healing. Remember, we are here for you…” I though, “somebody remembers; they haven’t forgotten.”
One of the enclosures was the following poem:
“The Elephant In the Room” by Terry Kettering
There’s an elephant in the room.
It is large and squatting, so it is Hard to get around it.
Yet we squeeze by with, “How are you?” And, “I’m fine…”
And a thousand other forms of trivial chatter.
We talk about the weather.
We talk about work.
We talk about everything else…except the elephant in the room.
There’s an elephant in the room.
We all know it is there.
We are thinking about the elephant as we talk together.
It is constantly on our minds.
For, you see, it is a very big elephant.
It has hurt us all.
But we do not talk about the elephant in the room.
O, please, say her name.
O, please, say “Barbara” again.
Oh, please, let’s talk about the elephant in the room.
For if we talk about her death perhaps we can talk about her life?
Can I say “Barbara” to you and not have you look away?
For if I cannot, then you are leaving me
Alone…
In a room…
With an elephant.
So I guess I just had to talk about the “elephant in the room”…I just had to say Mom is gone and I miss her so…
Her last Sunday with me comes to mind. She had just eaten breakfast – slower than usual. I was busy trying to get everything taken care of and set up so that I could go to church. I kept looking at her from the corner of my eye, I did not want her to think that I was concerned – if I looked calm and collected, she would rest in that everything was okay. However, I could sense something was not getting better. I finally sat across the table from her to have a much needed conversation, one that we had visited many a time. She almost seemed bothered by me interrupting her puzzle-making-time, but she finally looked up. We talked about wishes, decision, desires…I can almost picture her face and a look in her eyes of “I know what’s happening. I’m okay with it.” I went to church with a heaviness in my heart. I worshiped and prayed to the only One who would, once again, be my Supernatural-Strength in days to come – o how sweet it was. It was almost as if My Jesus cradled me and comforted me in a way that was going to raise me above what was up ahead.
So often I’ve felt that it is almost forbidden to cry, to remember. It is as if people around you are uncomfortable to even bring up Mom’s name. There have been times when all I want to do is sit with someone and simply talk about Mom – My Mom! I wonder how are my brother’s doing? Do they think of her as I do? Are they hurting? Do they need a hug? Do they need to talk about Mom?
Just the other day I received a letter from Charter Hospice (they were the ones that came in to help with Mom’s last days). At first I thought the letter was some form letter to tie up lose ends, you know business. The letter began with “Please accept our heartfelt sympathy in the loss of your mother, Elvira…” “Mom’s name!” was my first thought. This letter went on to say some very kind words. It ended with, “I have enclosed some information that may help you as you begin this journey of healing. Remember, we are here for you…” I though, “somebody remembers; they haven’t forgotten.”
One of the enclosures was the following poem:
“The Elephant In the Room” by Terry Kettering
There’s an elephant in the room.
It is large and squatting, so it is Hard to get around it.
Yet we squeeze by with, “How are you?” And, “I’m fine…”
And a thousand other forms of trivial chatter.
We talk about the weather.
We talk about work.
We talk about everything else…except the elephant in the room.
There’s an elephant in the room.
We all know it is there.
We are thinking about the elephant as we talk together.
It is constantly on our minds.
For, you see, it is a very big elephant.
It has hurt us all.
But we do not talk about the elephant in the room.
O, please, say her name.
O, please, say “Barbara” again.
Oh, please, let’s talk about the elephant in the room.
For if we talk about her death perhaps we can talk about her life?
Can I say “Barbara” to you and not have you look away?
For if I cannot, then you are leaving me
Alone…
In a room…
With an elephant.
So I guess I just had to talk about the “elephant in the room”…I just had to say Mom is gone and I miss her so…
Tuesday, March 9, 2010
Changes - kitchen
Changes - painting
Claudia is Engaged!
Happy Birthday Moni!
It was my niece, Moni's birthday yesterday. We had such a wonderful time celebrating her special day. From left to right - me, Lulu, Moni, Claudia, Nancy...I just love these girls. We are desiring to build beautiful memories together. Lunch was yummy, company was wonderful and the laughter was on going...good time :D
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