Our Secret Gardens

Would you take a journey with me to December 1991? Our family hadn't fully recovered from the passing of my brother-in-law, it had only been about three and a half months. We found ourselves in the midst of another crisis. Dad had just had heart-bypass surgery, he was doing really well. Something went wrong on his road to recovery; he took a turn for the worse (my mother and sister never left his side). One of my brother's and I finally decided to fly into Mexico because Dad just wasn't getting any better. We went from the Airport to the hospital. When we got there Dad had been rushed in to have emergency surgery (too complicated to go into detail). Then they asked for blood donors. I happened to have Dad's blood type (I never knew this), so I went in to get my blood drawn. I wasn't feeling well because I hadn't been eating for days because I had some kind of "stuff" in my mouth, my mouth was really raw. After they took my blood I felt so good that my Dad was going to get my blood, but felt so dizzy because I was too weak. I walked over to the cafeteria (and for the life of me I don't remember who was with me, (sorry guys) but I know I wasn't alone). We sat in the cafeteria, I was trying to sip orange juice, yes, orange juice of all things-this wasn't going too well. Then we saw my sister walking towards us, her face was pale and she looked like her life had just been zapped out. She talked very calmly and softly, "Dad didn't make it. Mom doesn't know yet, so keep your cool." We walked over to were everyone else was, very calmly we all sat there. The doctor finally came out and gave Mom the news we all knew. With the news he proceeded to tell us to stay calm, that if we wanted to avoid all the red tape we would have to act as if nothing happened so that our Dad could be released to us without any delay. They released our Dad to us as if he was still alive. Don't ask me the whys or anything; I still don't understand this whole deal. Once home with Dad, two brothers, my sister and I unwrapped Dad from the sheets and clothed him with his fancy-grey-suit. This was our Dad.

Here we are today.

Today I read something about a novel called The Secret Garden by Frances Hodgson Burnett that made me think this: How many of us have "locked up a secret garden" because of the pain or discomfort it brings or reminds us of? How many of us dare not go into a part of our memory because it just isn't pretty or comfortable?

God wants to heal, comfort, make whole. But first we have to allow Him into these places, these "secret gardens". We need to allow Him to enter in and do what is needful in order to bring that healing, that comfort, that assurance that everything is okay, that He was there as much as He is here. That everything that happens in our lives makes us who we are now. That nothing is wasted in God's economy. Everything has a purpose.

Once we allow the Lord to come into our "secret gardens", then He will give us beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning, the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness;

Why?

So that we might be called trees of righteousness, the planting of the Lord, that HE MIGHT BE GLORIFIED.

He has put a new song in my heart, great is the Lord!