Okay, so I've had another one of "those" weeks. That seems to be the norm around here. Mom had cataract surgery on Wednesday. Just a routine surgery, but, of course, with Mom's ailments there is never anything routine. Anyhow, things have finally settled down. So my daughter and I decided to have a night out. Last night we got to go to the movies. My niece gave us movie tickets on Christmas, so it was a treat on her - thank you Elvira! We are at the movies. I really felt awkward, not used to this movie thing. Angie and I decided to get some snacks - how much?! Okay, I won't even go into this=O

There we are all settled in and ready to enjoy a movie. Cute movie, some laughs and an overall relaxing, fun time. Then there was this scene at an attorneys office. I keep watching and enjoying, then...my mind goes way back to when I used to work. I know, what am I thinking, just enjoy the movie! But no, I let my mind race to being in an office, dressed for success. Okay shake it off - the movie is over and we come out and decide to walk over to get some frozen yogurt. I decide to wait outside in the patio for Angie to come out. There I am happy as a goose, people watching. I look over at this building, I see the name of a law firm that I was very acquainted with. And here my thoughts went even further. Yes, I pictured myself, once again doing that which I thoroughly enjoyed. The "stress" of preparing for trial. The awesome feeling of putting together a trial brief with all its exhibits and copies. Simply getting dressed for work everyday. The phones, etc. etc. - you get the picture. Yes, in my heart I wondered what it would be like to be in that sphere once again. To "feel" a sense of accomplishment and to feel like I am important and am doing something important. Believe you me, I've spoken to plenty of ladies and told them that being a stay-at-home-mom is the most important thing that they will ever do in their lives, but at this point these thoughts just overwhelmed me. I have never regretted my coming home when the Lord led me to, just at this point this wave of feelings came over me. I sat there for what it seems an eternity and I can tell you that I came home, not refreshed, but totally down-in-the-dump. Hard night all the way through.

Praise God there is morning! Through His Word He reassures me of what and who I am in Him. "Let the Word of Christ dwell in you richly in all wisdom..." Yes, His Word said to me to meditate on whatever is true...the thoughts that I had last night were not true. My identity, my worth does not come from "a career", or what I do, but it comes from being a Child of God and doing what HE CALLS me to do. I would never change my experience in the law field, but I would not change my times with my children either. I don't want to be where God doesn't want me to be, even if I think it will fulfill me. I guess, my flesh, chooses to forget all those headaches and awful-stress that came from being in the law field. Everywhere I go and everything I do has its good and its bad, but when it is God who has me in a place or position He is the one that carries me through when I can't go any further, even when I get allot of pats on the back.

So WHATEVER I do, in word or in deed, may I do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through Him and to bring Him glory.